Apple: Skin to the Core

This section summarizes “My Mother Delivers a Quick Lesson in Survival and History,” “Domestic Rate, Carlisle, PA, or A Grandmother Corresponds with Her Service-Bound Grandson,” “Jaboozie Brings My Aunt Home, Unexpectedly,” “Hunger Test: Primer Revisited,” “Making Promises,” and “The Ethnographer Turns the Rorschach Cards on Himself.”

In “My Mother Delivers a Quick Lesson in Survival and History,” Gansworth describes talking with his mother about his uncle. Although his memories are fond, she reveals a darker truth. Before Gansworth was born, his uncle threatened his older siblings. She took a baseball bat and beat him to defend her children.

“Domestic Rate, Carlisle, PA, or A Grandmother Corresponds with Her Service-Bound Grandson” is about Little Umma. At the end of her life, she got confused, sometimes thinking she was still a child at residential school. Gansworth’s brother once tried to visit the Carlisle school, but he wasn’t allowed inside, yet when a white scholar of Indigenous history visited the school, she was permitted to enter with her students. Despite the pain of the past, Gansworth is pleased that his nephew’s daughter knows a lot about the family’s history.

In “Jaboozie Brings My Aunt Home, Unexpectedly,” Gansworth recounts how he and Jaboozie remembered his aunt just after she died. As they talked about her beauty and strength, they felt like they’d brought her back to life.

“Hunger Test: Primer Revisited” is about the first book Gansworth learned to read, a counting book called Snuggles. It had strange art and it was about a greedy kitten. The book lives on in his family’s consciousness as a reminder about hunger and greed.

In “Making Promises,” Gansworth describes how his sister called and asked him to convince their mother to see a doctor. She was always gentle about revealing bad news, giving Gansworth time to brace himself.

In “The Ethnographer Turns the Rorschach Cards on Himself,” Gansworth recounts how the ethnographer who interviewed Little Umma wrote a book that mentioned Gansworth. He didn’t know how to categorize Gansworth because he was “from Tuscarora, but also / eternally not of Tuscarora” (313). Gansworth feels that this description says more about the ethnographer than about him.

This section summarizes “We Had Some Good Times Anyway,” “The Ethnographer Leaves Us a Gift,” “I Gain a Ribbon Shirt in Bloodlines,” “Indian Picnic Cornbred,” and “Ash and Smoke.”

“We Had Some Good Times Anyway” is what Gansworth’s mother said about his father on the day of his funeral. Gansworth only saw his father around 10 times in 20 years because of his father’s absence and alcoholism.

In “The Ethnographer Leaves Us a Gift,” Gansworth recounts how the ethnographer sent recordings of Little Umma and her peers speaking Tuscarora. These recordings allowed young people like Gansworth’s niece to learn their language. Younger generations have a stronger connection to their culture, going through Naming Ceremonies, marrying traditionally, and growing heritage gardens. Gansworth wonders what his grandmother would think if she knew that her great-great-granddaughter had heard her voice across the many decades.

In “I Gain a Ribbon Shirt in Bloodlines,” Gansworth tells of how his nephew married a Tuscarora woman. Gansworth designed the wedding invitations, combining their respective clan symbols: the eel and the turtle. To thank him, they gave him an elaborate ribbon shirt that took a long time to make. The marriage helped Gansworth feel less like an outsider in his community.

“Indian Picnic Cornbred” describes the Weekend of the National Picnic, which Gansworth calls “Indian Picnic.” It’s open to outsiders, and non-Indigenous Americans can buy food from Indigenous vendors. The proceeds go to the Nation. That year, the family that made cornbread was absent, which was a great loss because the dish is difficult to make and is much loved. Gansworth visited the wreckage of his burned-down house. He and a cousin listened to a new Tragically Hip album together. The fire had been “caused by an accident involving her father” (330); they didn’t discuss it. She gave him some cornbread; someone new had learned to make it.

In “Ash and Smoke,” Gansworth recalls how his mother used ash to make lye for corn soup. When a car drove through the dining room wall, igniting a propane tank and destroying the home, ash was suddenly abundant. Gansworth associates the smell of smoke with his mother; she smoked, and he wonders whether in-utero nicotine exposure made him short. After his mother died, following a stroke, Gansworth’s niece lit tobacco to usher her spirit to the Skyworld.

This section summarizes “Howdy Prepares for the Future,” “Lost (in Translation),” “And on This Day, We Commence,” “Dog Street, July 3, 2009,” “Lost and Found on Dog Street,” and “On New Year’s Eve, My Sister Sends Me a Photo.”

“Howdy Prepares for the Future” describes Howdy, the last fluent speaker of Tuscarora, who developed extensive language worksheets so that young Tuscarora people could learn their language. He died at age 96. Gansworth’s nephew who heads the language revitalization efforts in their community can speak Tuscarora very well; Gansworth wishes that he had learned more of his language as a youth. Unable to speak his native language, he feels “Lost in Time, Lost in Space, Lost in Translation” (346).

“Lost (in Translation)” comprises two versions of the same poem, one in English, the other in Tuscarora. The poem is a dialogue between Gansworth and an old man who asks him questions. Gansworth doesn’t hear or understand what the old man has said. The old man asks, after Gansworth has walked away, whether he can hear the rain.

In “And on This Day, We Commence,” Gansworth recounts delivering a speech to his graduating class. He received a call from his sister, telling him that a young man from their community had died in a car crash after joy-riding through the trees. He attended the young man’s wake and saw old friends. Together, they thought about the friends that they’d lost. The fire at the wake burned all night, smoke and ash ushering the young man to his ancestors in the Skyworld.

“Dog Street, July 3, 2009” takes place just before Fourth of July celebrations were to begin. Gansworth visited the reservation and saw that the street names were now written in both English and Tuscarora. A young couple in an ATV sped past him. Looking out over the reservoir, he reflected on how he had changed since he was a young man.

“Lost and Found on Dog Street” is dedicated to cartoonist Lynda Barry. It describes a collection of things that Gansworth lost during his lifetime, inspired by lost and found ads in newspapers. The things range from belongings, like sweaters, t-shirts, and jewelry, to more abstract concepts, like Gansworth’s heart or his “fluency in Tuscarora” (361). Gansworth introduced Barry to the place where he grew up; he thought his upbringing was uncannily similar to hers, despite their different backgrounds. He introduced Barry to his partner.

“On New Year’s Eve, My Sister Sends Me a Photo” is the memoir’s final chapter. Most of Gansworth’s family photographs were destroyed in the fire. Sometimes, Gansworth and his siblings recreate the lost images. His sister sent him an old aerial photograph of their childhood home; Gansworth had never seen it from above before. He wondered if this is the view his family members see on their way to the Skyworld. Perhaps he’ll see the same thing when he dies, allowing him to return home one last time.