The Secret Life of Bees

The theme of grief is so prominent in this novel it could almost be seen as a character itself. Lily holds the grief of her mother leaving her, of causing her mother’s death, and of being rejected by T. Ray. She spends most of her young life longing to be loved: “Children did not have two parents who refused to love them. One, maybe, but for pity’s sake not two” (41). To cope with her grief, Lily creates a narrative in which her mother is perfect and loving, and while her mother may have been loving, it was Deborah’s own grief, sadness, and depression that rendered her unable to care for Lily in the way Lily always wanted.

T. Ray is cruel to Lily because he cannot see her outside of the grief he has experienced with her mother. Because T. Ray cannot feel his grief or give voice to it, he is also unable to let it go. Lily does not recognize this until the end of the novel, but when she does, it is a powerful reminder of what can happen to a person when they stuff all their grief away.

June’s grief over the heartbreak that she experienced years before results in her fear to commit to the man she loves. June’s other major grief, the one that Lily cannot seem to understand, is over the fact that August worked for a white woman for so long. This grief is not contained to the one circumstance of August’s work situation, but the reality of America and how white supremacy has caused and will continue to pose a threat to the pink house and those who live and worship there. Zach’s grief over the system of structural racism turns into anger and then motivation as he longs to be part of a system that will “bust ass with the truth” (121).

May’s grief is the most encompassing of them all and is a direct result of racism and oppression. May’s state of being is a response to April’s grief over the racist reality she lived in, and when she can’t bear it any longer, she dies by suicide. August and June have been grieving May long before they find her drowned in the river, a fate that they always seemed to feel coming. May’s character is an example of what happens when one is overcome by grief, when there is no protection between oneself and the world of heartbreak. May’s grief is caused by institutional racism, and for her, death is the only relief.

While highlighting the many tolls grief may take, the novel also examines how people may lift themselves out of grief. August shows Lily that while the burden of one’s grief may never be totally lifted, sharing it with others can make the load a little easier to bear.